Happy Birthday!!!

Happy 3rd Birthday baby girl!!!! I could never put into words how much I love and adore you! Last night you couldn't relax to go to sleep because you were so excited for your birthday. I asked if you wanted me to tell you about the day you were born and you said yes. I told you about how I wanted to keep you in my belly longer but the doctor said you needed to come out sooner. And how Max was so little and he ate Oreos the morning we went to the hospital. And he stayed with aunt Becky while we were at the hospital. And about how you came so fast and I was so surprised. And you didn't cry at all when you came out. And you ate right away. And you had gorgeous black curly hair....that all fell out a few days later. And you were so little. Average, really, but so much smaller than Max that you seemed tiny to me.  You smiled up at me through all of it. I felt bad because I left out some parts. Like how I cried the night before because I wasn't ready for another baby. And I cried that morning on my way to the hospital. And when you were first born I didn't bond right away. But baby girl I hope you know that had nothing to do with you. It was all about me being overwhelmed. I wish I could change the story but I can't. And I won't. Because one day you might feel the same overwhelming feelings when you have a baby. And I want you to know that they are normal. And that it doesn't make you a bad mama. And that your baby will be just fine. I can't change the story. But I will tell you something that is truer than true. If I could have had a magic ball that day that would have shown me three years into the future and I could have seen how darling you would be and witnessed your spunk and felt even a fraction of the love I have for you and the joy I feel from being your mama I would have run to the hospital, smiling and skipping, and begged them to get you into my life as soon as possible. Baby girl, you are wonderful!!!! You are adored by everyone that meets you. And I am so, so, so very lucky to be your mama. I love you.

I was a little sad to see you turn three because you were just such an adorable two year old. I am morning the passing of that time. I will treasure the memories of you at that age and stage forever. I am sure you will be just as adorable as a three year old. And I am looking forward to a year filled with all the happiness and new adventures that will make me just as sad to see you turn four and leave three behind as I am to see you leave two behind.

You are the best! I love you!

Mama

Dear Maggie,

Sugar and spice. That is you. You keep me on my toes and for some reason I can't help but find even your spiciest spice enduring. You get a lot of compliments. We started going to church at our new ward and after the first week your nursery leaders commented on how happy they were to have you and how you made nursery so great. You have new leaders now and the compliments keep coming. Today when I dropped you off a lady who is not a leader but is there often commented on how wonderful you are and said that you are confident but also so kind. Then when I picked you up your new teachers gave me a thumbs up and said you were so smart and awesome. They are right. By the way, you have no problem separating from us to go to nursery. You wave and walk away with your sassy little walk and my heart swells and aches all at the same time. I'm so happy that you are mine. I adore you!!!!

Love,
Mama